Taking Time For YOU

by Trula on December 11, 2007 · No Comments

I saw this question recently: Do you just walk out for an afternoon and leave your husbad with the kids, and not think about the dirt on the floor, or diapers being washed, or that you haven’t changed your pants for three days?

YES!!!

Basically, that’s it. Isn’t that what your husband does? He just takes his alone time, he doesn’t depend on you to make it happen for him.

I am very domestic, ok, very family and home-oriented, and I truly feel keeping a clean house is part of what makes me a good mother. I was raised in filth so it is very very important to me to raise my kids in a clean home that they won’t feel ashamed to bring friends over. That said, I have been operating on ‘good enough’ housecleaning for a long, long time. I just don’t have the time to keep my house Good House Keeping clean nor the resources right now to pay someone else to do it nor the energy to keep on top of my kids to always do their chores. So yah, there are days the floors are dirty, nights the dishes go unwashed, and as we speak I have a big pile of laundry hiding in my upstairs hall closet. But guess what, this week I have visited a new friend at her home, went with other friends to look at stuff for my store, viewed another storefront as a backup, and had a neighbor over to sit by the fire outside. I wouldn’t have been able to do any of those things if I had focused on the housecleaning that needs to be done or the kids.

The dirt on the floor will be there when you get back, and so will the dirty diapers. If you just take even 30 minutes for yourself you will feel so much better about yourself and life in general. You will also gain the confidence to spend even more time alone and require more of your husband as a parent to your children and partner to you. I am sure he loves you and wants you to be happy. He may not even realize that spending all your time taking care of the house and kids doesn’t make you blissfully happy, LOL.

I must say it is harder to get alone time when your kids are small, because of how they whine and pull on you. I used to not even be able to go to the bathroom without my kids banging on the door. But as they got older I realized it was because I had allowed them and trained them to see me as being 100% always on beck and call for them. I still feel a lot of conflict about this and my kids are 18, 13, and 10!! but I just take my time anyway because whenever I didn’t I felt horrible and it caused me to lash out at them and resent them, and my husband.

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