I got a question in an email from a woman who was being bullied by her doctor into consenting to circumcise her son. She wrote to me that she followed his advice and made an appointment to have her son circumcised. She wanted to cancel it but felt scared that they would have charges filed against her for not following through with the circumcision. I decided to post my answer here as well:
When I was going through major baby daddy drama with Scott’s (my oldest son) father, at the child support hearing what struck me most was how they worded my relationship with my child. They wrote me as: ‘Trula Breckenridge, Scott’s biological mother and nearest friend’. That really resonated with me and has stuck with me all these years. Also when I was leaving my daughter’s father, who was physically abusive…the primary kicker for getting out of that relationship was protecting her from further harm.
I say this to you because you are going to have to develop a backbone and learn to stand up for your child. You are his nearest friend! You are his first line of defense in this world. You’ve got to speak for him until he can speak for himself. I know this is hard, but do NOT allow the doctors to cut off a part of your son’s penis. If the doctor gets nasty ask him, in a sweet tone of voice, if he himself is circumcised (he probably is, men who are intact are generally NOT in favor of circumcision) and if so, is he projecting his own issues and insecurity surrounding that onto your child? Men who are circumcised tend to want this practice to continue because (outside of those who do it for religion) it makes what happened to them seem normal.
Also give him some facts:
1)Since 1997 more than half of all American boys remained natural.
2)Breast cancer is more common than penile cancer. By his logic infant girls should get mastectomies.
3)Circumcision destroys one-half of the skin and nervous system of the infant penis. It isn’t just a little piece of skin. When completely unfolded in the average-sized adult male, the foreskin is the size of a note card.
Call the doctor and cancel the appointment, plain and simple. You are not committing any crime, you are not doing anything wrong by leaving your son with his natural, intact body. I understand your fear but they are not going to take your son from you because you choose to exercise your right to keep his penis natural and intact. Please check out to No Circ website for more information and resources:
http://www.nocirc.org/
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- I'm Trula and this is my mommy blog. Being the mother to these children has been one of the most beautiful things to happen to me. Trula Kids, formerly Mama Specific Productions, is part of the MSPmedia network ©2002-2011 All Rights Reserved
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Thank you for posting this. I have an additional suggestion I hope you’ll forward to her. After (or before) canceling the appointment, she can pick up the phone and call DOC, Doctors Opposing Circumcision . They are a physicians group who field calls like this all the time. I’m sure they would be very supportive.
John D. Geisheker, J.D., LL.M.
Executive Director and General Counsel
Telephone (cell): +1 206-465-6636
George C. Denniston, M.D., M.P.H.
President and Chief Executive Officer
Telephone: +1 360-385-1882
Mark D. Reiss, M.D.
Executive Vice-President
Telephone: +1 415-647-2687
George Hill, Bioethicist
Vice President for Bioethics and Medical Science
Telephone: +1 225-383-8067
Oh cool, thanks for the link and information!