Mean Mama

Because my writing has been so mama-focused (for example some of my books are Afro Mama, Veggie Mama, Teen Mama, etc) my kids like to say when they get upset with me that I should call myself Mean Mama. Oh my, this hurts me so much, because I don’t want to be mean and don’t consider myself to be a mean mother.

I do yell too much.

I used to curse frequently. Not at them, but around them. I have since stopped and that makes a world of difference to the atmosphere of our home. Now I am working on my yelling. I don’t yell as much at them anymore, but now they say I am making scary faces. Often I am not even aware I am doing it. For example, say I tell them to pick up the floor. No response, so I ask them this time. No response. So I say it again (I usually start yelling the third time) but now that I am working on not yelling, I say in a normal tone of voice but firmer this time, Please pick up the floor NOW. My kids will say Ack! Why are you looking at us so crazy! and scurry to pick up their toys and stuff.

LOL! It cracks me up. But it’s not really funny…I want my children to respect me, not be afraid of me. and I don’t believe that raising kids with fear is neccessary to inspire respect. I want to be a gentle mother.